Are you a fan of "Dancing with the Stars" or “So You Think You Can Dance,” or do you enjoy watching dance competitions on YouTube? I’ve always been captivated by all forms of dance, from ballet to hip-hop. I find it fascinating how two people can master complex moves to create a beautiful performance.
Learning to communicate with our kiddos shares many similarities with learning to dance. In today's Tuesday Parenting Tip, we’ll uncover the steps to creating a beautiful "communication dance" with your child, no matter their age.
Finding Your Rhythm:
Just as every dance has its unique rhythm, every family has its unique communication style. Finding your family's rhythm requires patience, practice, and attentiveness to each other's cues.
Some families are gifted at using humor, while others use playful sarcasm, and still, others are great at using funny phrases or code words to communicate. With the ever-present use of technology, some families use texting as a conversation starter or check-in. Whatever your style, pay attention to the ebb and flow of conversation and adjust your steps accordingly to maintain harmony and connection.
Leading and Following:
In the dance of communication, there is a delicate balance between leading and following. Like skilled dance partners, parents take turns leading and following in conversations with their children. Sometimes, parents lead the conversation, guiding it with open-ended questions and active listening. Other times, they follow their children's lead, allowing them to express themselves freely and openly. The key is to listen to understand, not just to respond, and to build trust by being a safe person with whom they can share anything.
The Power of Nonverbal Communication:
Just as dancers convey emotions through their movements, you communicate with your children through nonverbal cues. Eye contact, facial expressions, and body language speak volumes. Some research suggests that non-verbal cues account for up to 90% of the message in a conversation. Without saying a word, we can convey warmth, empathy, and understanding or coldness, apathy, and indifference. That’s powerful! So, let’s pay attention to our nonverbal cues and use them to enhance our connection with our children.
Embracing Mistakes:
In the world of dance, mistakes are inevitable, but they are also opportunities for growth and learning. Similarly, in communication, mistakes are a natural part of the process.
In my view, any attempt at communication is a win. I believe the only “true mistake” in communication comes from avoiding important conversations or reacting in a negative manner when our children share sensitive or surprising information that contradicts our values or opinions.
The great news is that we can always go back, initiate a “re-do,” apologize if necessary, and try again. We can embrace mistakes with grace and humility and use them as opportunities to deepen understanding and strengthen our bond with our children.
The Joy of Connection:
At the heart of both dance and communication lies the joy of connection. Just as dancers experience the thrill of moving in sync with their partners, parents experience the joy of connecting with their children through meaningful conversations.
There is nothing I value more than having heart-to-heart conversations with my boys. Those moments where we learn something new about each other or share a laugh, a hug, or a cry. We leave with a deeper understanding of one another and a tighter bond. I believe all parents cherish these moments of connection as they form the foundation of strong and lasting relationships.
Conclusion:
As we journey through parenthood, let us remember that communication is not just a series of words exchanged but a beautiful dance of connection and understanding.
By finding our family's rhythm, leading and following with grace, harnessing the power of nonverbal communication, embracing mistakes, and cherishing the joy of connection, we can navigate parenthood with more ease and understanding. Let's take the first steps towards better communication together.
Warmly, Coco
P.S. Struggling to communicate with your kiddo? Give us a call, and let’s chat! You can set up a FREE discovery call HERE. If you're ready to be a part of a supportive community of moms, join our Best Mom Ever Coaching & Support Group.
